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[bajamutblast]

I won't make this prettier what are you talking about.

Notes:

- Gigaflare (March) = 3x Remaining

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[bajamutblast]

[Dion is quick to shake his head. Twice, for that matter.]

You need not thank me. Nor do you need to apologize.

[He knows exactly why Joshua resists the idea of crying, and so he does not press. He simply pulls his hands back once he's certain Joshua has calmed enough, opting instead to clutch both of his own. Their tea is sat down for them, but Dion doesn't immediately turn to it. His attention is focused on his partner, trying to ascertain exactly what he needs.

He doesn't expect the subject Joshua broaches, however. He's known for some time that something terrible happened before his arrival, but the idea of discussing it, especially now...]

Are you certain you are ready for that? I understand that things are... difficult right now. Thus, I would not ask you to take on an extra burden, just to keep me in the loop. [He pauses thoughtfully.] Gladly will I listen, but only if you are certain.

cw: vague talk of monstery gore

[kingincognito]

[ Their tea arriving to the table is a welcome interruption, and he is tempted to lfit the cup to his lips if only to inhale the fragrant steam. But being able to smell it from the table is enough. The scent is soothing, and Dion's presence even more so.

He inhales deeply through his nose, closing his eyes. ]

I... I am certain. It is not a burden for me to speak of it. I live with it in my nightmares so often that it has become a part of my days. I only do not speak of it because I do not wish to burden others.

[ Opening his eyes once more, he parts his lips and pulls in a breath, looking up at Dion for a moment. But once he begins to speak, he looks down at his clasped hands. ]

Shortly after we found ourselves here, we joined a party intent on attacking the enemy while he slumbered through the winter months. But when we came upon him, he was awake. He should not have awakened for some months yet. Our plan failed almost immediately, and we were plunged into utter chaos.

He was... enormous. Like an Eikon. Clive chose to become Ifrit, and he was actually able to damage the fallen sun to an extent. But the moment that I also decided to prime, that false god took control of my body. He set me upon Clive, and I could do nothing to stop it. Could do nothing but watch, like a prisoner in my own body.

[ His hands tighten in their clench. ]

It is because of him that Clive now suffers the curse. It is because of him that my talons, my beak left irreversible scars on my brother's chest from where I was made to tear out his heart. And if it is also because of him that my brother is now missing...

[bajamutblast]

You will never be a burden to me, Joshua.

[But other than that, Dion listens. His mouth presses into a thin line as he does, and his brows draw together. His expression borders on fury, but who's surprised with a tale like that. Dion's never come face to face with Suri, but he already knows enough to loathe the creature. Even still, his blood does begin to boil, enough that he briefly toys with the idea of throwing caution to the wind and chasing that very wretch down and making him pay.

Toys with it, but ultimately tucks it away. He knows where he needs to be, and it's right here.]

I would tell you to not blame yourself for something you had no control over, but it seems you have a grasp on that already. [He exhales.] But I must caution you to keep your fury in check. You are right to be angry, but if he has been able to use you once...

[Dion's gaze grows distant. Briefly, he finds himself in the throne room, watching his father take a spear meant for a monster.]


I know you are strong. So please... do not play into his hand.

[kingincognito]

[ Dion has more faith in Joshua than Joshua has in himself. At least he looks like he has a grasp on it, from the outside. Though he's far from the days where he did actively blame himself, there are still so many thoughts of what he could have done differently. So many nightmares where it was his fault.

But he won't say any of that. He won't break the illusion. Dion believes in him, and he wants to cling to that. ]

I... I try. I do.

[ He takes in a breath, reaching out to cup his tea with one hand. Not to lift to his lips, just to touch. The heat on the side of the cup gives him a sensation to focus on. ]

Beiwe's blessing gives me some protection from his influence, I believe, or at least from being corrupted again. But you do not have that protection. If he has turned me against my brother, I fear what might happen if...

[ If he gets his claws into Dion. But he doesn't even want to speak that into possibility. ]

I will not go after him. As much as I desire nothing more, I will not.